than ever call Secure Mail again.
I am trying to get my passport back but have an odd entrance to my house. Which means they didn’t leave it the other day.
Not to worry, I thought, I shall simply call them, explain how to get in and receive delivery of this precious item.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I am, my mother continually despairs, extremely laid back. Able to take things as they come, put a positive slant on even the most trialing situation.
Until, it transpires, that situation involves a pre-recorded voice message which not only repeats everything you say but then gets it wrong, leaving you with no option to speak to any living human. Three times.
Deep breath in. Deep breath out. Deep breath in.
I have emailed them. Expressing my desire to cry, begging them to reconsider their entire telephone operating system and generally acting like a women who might storm their office and cling to the leg of the nearest staff member until her passport is returned.
I got this in return:
Thank you for taking the time to contact us by e-mail. Secure Mail Services welcomes your comments, complaints and compliments on our services. We are always ready to listen to you and will take any concerns most seriously. We are not able to guarantee a response to each individual question. * Please note that we cannot process delivery requests or chase a delivery from this e-mail. * Please contact a Customer Service Representative via the telephone number printed on the calling card or letter you received from us. Again thank you for your comments.
But it wont let me talk to a Customer Service Representative!
MAN ALIVE IS THIS SOME CRUEL AND HEARTLESS PLOT AGAINST HUMANITY?
Right, where are they based…..